Today is your first birthday. I cannot believe a year has passed by. It makes me sad that you are no longer a baby. I wish I had spent more time cuddling you than worrying about your sleep and schedule and what you were eating. But that’s what mothers do- worry.
You have grown so much over the past year. And so have I. I learnt that it’s ok to cry because sometimes you just need a good cry! It’s ok to spend all day in your pjs. It’s ok to drink cold coffee(eventually I just started drinking iced coffee). It’s ok to sleep with one eye open in case you need me. It’s ok to sleep with your arm trapped under a baby who has been suckling at your boob for 3 hours. Its ok to sing even when you don’t know the words because all that matters is you smiling. It’s ok because in the end I wish I could do it all over again- the sleepless nights, the 2 am feeding, the 5am feedings, the poopy diapers, the rocking and rocking some more, the endless off key singing.. Everything- Because you are worth it.
I hope you read this at some point in the future and know that you have taught me more than you will ever know. So if you a reading this and we have just had a disagreement- it’s ok, because no matter what I will always love you and I will always be on your side. Just keep in mind, I am not perfect but my love for you is.
Love you forever Zara bear.