My baby hates me

Yes! It’s true. Well not entirely true. My little Z is now 19 months and her personality is shining through. She is pretty opinionated, stubborn and doesn’t give up on what she wants (I wonder where she gets that from). 

Since I have gone back to work, I have noticed a change in her attitude towards me. During the week when I am in the office, I drop her at daycare but my husband picks her up. He then, has an hour to hour and a half with her. Initially I felt this was great as he gets to bond with her. But now I am going to admit I am slightly jealous of it. When I come home, Zara does not want anything to do with me. She runs to Dada and cuddles with him and gives him kisses, while momma gets a  ‘NO WAY’!! At first, it was funny, then it got annoying and now it hurts! I know I should not take it personally, but I can’t help it. I want the cuddles and the kisses! 

Going back to work, even though it is part time (4 days) has been an adjustment for me. I am just starting to feel a sense of balance. Between, getting the cold shoulder from my Zara and feeling the pressure of balancing home and work, it has been a tough road. But that got me thinking. I felt overwhelmed by this change. And I am an adult who has gone through changes before and had to adapt. I thought, because Zara was already going to daycare prior to me working, she would not feel the difference. But she does. I dropped her and picked her up before. We had more alone time together. And then, it dawned on me, my baby doesn’t hate me. My baby misses me. She also needs time to adjust to this change. 

So, every Friday we spend some quality mother and daughter time. Some days we go out to the library or the acquarium. Some days we just have coffee (I have coffee, Zara has a banana bread). Some days we stay in our pjs. Some days we plan things, some days we don’t. And yes come, Monday or Tuesday she goes back to ‘Dada Dada’ everything. But I think back to our Fridays. It will take time for Zara to adjust. It did for me. I try not to take it personally or feel guilty about it. Instead, I plan our next ‘Friday mother daughter day’.

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